a summer in review

I hope that when i look back later in life I will look back at this summer as a time of personal growth and a time spent with friends.
The only trouble with that scenario is that this summer has been the summer of the end of Josh for me. This whole summer has led up to the moment where he finally admits he doesn't want me and I am not worth fighting for.
I hope that is not all I remember of this summer.
I pray that I will be ok.
I know that I had a lot of great times with him this summer but I think for the first time in my life the terrible times that I have endured may shadow over those good times, breaking them down into a waste of my time.
count them...1, 2, 3.
I got my heart broken by the same guy 3 times in a matter of 3 months. Who do I have to blame? No one but myself.
I think it is a vast understatement to say that I got my heart broken, It is more accurate to say that my spirit and life has been shattered.
The good news is I am heading back to gainesville. The bad news is i am coming back without Josh's heart. I am on my own now. No one to care what happens to me, no one to call to see how my day went. No one to talk about the few things I know about politics with. There is so much that I already miss and I just saw him yesterday.
It is going to be the roughest year of my life.

summer events that were fun to remember...
1 going to ichetucknee multiple times.
2 seeing movies the opening nights with josh, ben and heather.
3 bible studies with david
4 times when ben, josh, me, heather, and david all got together.
5 Rock band with the shrutes.
6 spending nights with my sissy and her sort of adopted daughters.
7 scratching Josh's legs and watching tv
8 Kyle's wedding with Josh's awesome family
9 island's of adventures with misty and jonathon
10 loving on misty's cat, smokey and david's animals.
11 getting to know New Beginnings people.
12 Rededicating my life to Jesus Christ.

I will try to stand on these things and remember the good times and not the depression that I am going back into.